Before I explain the title of this post, I first need to give you some background. Bear with me :-)
My mother-in-law lives with us, and has for 4 years now. I love her dearly, and having her here has been a great blessing.
Essentially, life around here is like this:
I leave for work while everyone else is still asleep.
My husband and his mom chat over coffee, and she usually takes the kids to school while he gets ready for work.
She doesn't work, so she picks them up from school. It makes for a long, boring day, so she usually does the grocery shopping, laundry, housekeeping and starts dinner to keep busy.
I know. You all want her :-)
That is an IMMEASURABLE blessing to me. But...sometimes having her do so much made me feel inadequate, unnecessary.
That's all coming to an end.
Well, you know in my last real post how I shared my discontentment? How God has turned off my desire for the things I usually do, and I'm not sure what to do next?
Little did I know just how soon I would have an answer.
The very next day after that post, I came home to see some scribbled notes on a piece of notebook paper. The following day some included some conversations, which ended with a handshake.
Three days later: suddenly Jeff's mom is working, and life as I've known it has been turned upside down.
Aaron will now have be enrolled in after-school care, because gramma won't be able to pick him up anymore.
She will also not have time to cook, and clean, and all the stuff she spoils me by doing now.
So guess who will? Me.
How's that for God speaking clearly?
My feelings of inadequacy as a wife and mom, my mother-in-law's need for something more, financial provisions in a tough economy, my discontent - God planned them all, to bring us to this place. This place where my kids will be mothered by their mother. Where I can do the things my traditional housewife mother trained me to do, so I can get back my confidence as a wife and mother.
I know this will be a big change, and it will be tough. Tough with increased responsibilites for me, tough adjustment for my kids. But God knows what He's doing, and this is His best for us right now.
So I gladly receives this blessing, and praise God for loving me and my family enough to take care of all the details.
But, if I don't post in like, 3 months, now you'll know why: I'll probably be falling asleep while I try to fold laundry :-)
Well said. As Beth Moore would say, "It's tough being a woman"...and a mother. Welcome back to motherhood. I still struggle with all of these issues and more.
ReplyDeleteHappy Friday. Happy adjustment.
peace~elaine
I hope the transition is smooth for everyone. I can only imagine what an adjustment it will be for you all.
ReplyDeleteBeth, it's great that you see God's hand in all of the changes you're going through -- and that you're accepting it all and praising Him for it. May He continue to bless!
ReplyDeleteWOW, that will be a different way of doing things! I'm thinking...you'll like it! :)
ReplyDeleteBYW, i bought new undies this weekend, just so ya know!
I came across your blog via Beth's LPM blog. I love the title of your blog--and God is just so good--working in our life with impeccable timing. I read your post--and just want to encourage you in this new journey He has you on!! Nice meeting you!!!
ReplyDeleteBeth, I can so relate to so many of your feelings. My mil lived with us for 8 months and has been gone now for almost 3 months. While she was with us I had mixed feelings. She didn't do nearly as much as your mil, but she did help some. Some days I greatly appreciated it. Other days I felt she wasn't contributing enough to the family welfare. Still other times I wrestled with having another woman in my kitchen, cleaning my home, carting my kids around. I'm not a very domestic woman so I felt a little threatened by this woman who had great domestic skills.
ReplyDeleteWhen she left it was a fairly big adjustment. Suddenly, I didn't have the option of having someone else step in when I needed help. I was it. Definitely an adjustment.
However, in the long run it's been a good thing. I'm much more appreciative of my home and much more domestically inclined now that the full responsibility for my home has returned to me. I also spend a lot more time interacting with my family because I can't just think, "They're fine, they're with Grandma."
Having her here for a season was a good thing. But when it's all said and done, I want to be the mom and the housekeeper and the cook and the family manager. I didn't realize it until it wasn't fully mine, but now I do.
You'll have adjustments, but I bet it will all be good in the end, especially if she's going to help out financially.
Wow! Big changes! Are you still gonna work, too?
ReplyDelete~Stacy
Well, the Lord certainly did give you an answer. Praying God will help you enjoy this time of transition.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Joy
Wow, I wish all my answers were given so clearly! :)
ReplyDeleteI don't know how working moms get it all done. I really don't. They amaze me.
There's not enough time in the day for a woman to do all the things she should be doing to feel that she's done her job and have that feeling of adequacy. It's hard being a wife and mom!
I hope you find your confidence again! And if you find a way to enjoy folding laundry, PLEASE let me know! :)